well then

A good night's sleep would most likely have helped, but I didn't get one. Too many images and thoughts flying around in my head, I have woken with one of my headaches. So many things have just added up to make me grieve with the deepest sadness.

My online friend, Kate, losing her mother has given me an awful reminder of how much we have lost with my Mum's death. It is almost four years since she died of leukemia, and some days I just miss her so much. But I get past that, and life goes on, usually, but not this week. I can't move past the sadness. She should be here, loving her family, taking joy in her grandchildren.

This week marked the anniversary of the drowning death of a toddler near here, and the memorial notices in the local paper nearly broke my heart. I can't imagine that heartbreak.

And the situation in New Orleans is just too bad to comprehend. I keep thinking that this is in America, how can this be? So much anger and suffering, death and sadness. And then guilt, because we have everything, and our lives go on. I have made a donation, but it seems so little in the face of the massive scale of human misery caused by Hurricane Katrina.

And all the bad things in the world continue - war, genocide, hunger, fear, sickness, terrorism, death. Iraq, the Sudan, Jordan. Beslan, 9-11, Bosnia, Rwanda, tsunami-affected Asia. The tragedy continues, even though it is not newsworthy. Our responsibility to our neighbours never diminishes.

Craving peace. Gonna sit on the front porch and let the sunshine and silence wash over me. Renew my heart.