annual Christmas rant
For so many months, I look forward to Christmas, I love all the trimmings, buying gifts, making and sending cards, decorating, baking, carols and nativities and Church services, the whole shebang! But every year, a few days before Christmas, I pull up short and realise how much I don't actually enjoy Christmas Day. Sad, huh? Last night I had my annual rant to Ray, and today I just feel like crying.
I will spend the next two days ironing and baking and packing suitcases. I will make lists to check off as I pack the car. Because Christmas Day we have to travel down to spend time with the extended family, stay overnight, and do the other family on Boxing Day. I find it exhausting to do these overnighters at other times of the year, but this one just leaves me dismayed.
Christmas morning, we will rise fairly early (and everyone who has kids knows this one LOL!), we will do presents with our kids, with one eye on the clock. We will clear up and make our special Christmas breakfast (our one and only family tradition - cheese and bacon croissants and orange juice). We will pack the car with bedding and suitcases, food and gifts, and head off. We will stop in to see James. If it is hot, our van has no air conditioning, and travelling in it is tiring and uncomfortable anyway - it is a very different matter to traveling in a modern car. We will be late for lunch. We will be crammed into a small hot house with mostly people we generally only see once or twice a year. There will be a frenzy of food and grog and gifts, and then we will return to my Dad's house overnight.
Boxing Day we will drive an hour in the wrong direction (heaven help us if it is hot!), and do lunch and gifts all over again. Then we will have a three hour drive home, with exhausted and overwrought kids.
And don't even mention the fact that we haven't been able to attend Christmas morning Church in many many years.
Next I go through the list of reasons why it is good to do Christmas Day this way, but the list is not convincing me so much any more. Yes, the children love to see their cousins - but they see them other times of the year too. Yes, the kids are excited about presents from Grandpa, but a few days wait wouldn't be that hard. Yes, some older family members would be disappointed not to have the entire family gathered around on Christmas Day, but I'm growing less inclined to humour them on this one. And I am growing concerned that we are not creating a central family space of our own, that the children will be happy to return to when they are grown (though not necessarily at Christmas) - James isn't planning to be a part of any of our family Christmas stuff, which makes me just so sad.
Every year I say that we will just have to put our (collective) foot down, and confess we want to make Christmas Day a day for our own family stuff, and will not be travelling down to join the extended family. But so far it hasn't happened. Maybe next year.
-- end of rant --
I will spend the next two days ironing and baking and packing suitcases. I will make lists to check off as I pack the car. Because Christmas Day we have to travel down to spend time with the extended family, stay overnight, and do the other family on Boxing Day. I find it exhausting to do these overnighters at other times of the year, but this one just leaves me dismayed.
Christmas morning, we will rise fairly early (and everyone who has kids knows this one LOL!), we will do presents with our kids, with one eye on the clock. We will clear up and make our special Christmas breakfast (our one and only family tradition - cheese and bacon croissants and orange juice). We will pack the car with bedding and suitcases, food and gifts, and head off. We will stop in to see James. If it is hot, our van has no air conditioning, and travelling in it is tiring and uncomfortable anyway - it is a very different matter to traveling in a modern car. We will be late for lunch. We will be crammed into a small hot house with mostly people we generally only see once or twice a year. There will be a frenzy of food and grog and gifts, and then we will return to my Dad's house overnight.
Boxing Day we will drive an hour in the wrong direction (heaven help us if it is hot!), and do lunch and gifts all over again. Then we will have a three hour drive home, with exhausted and overwrought kids.
And don't even mention the fact that we haven't been able to attend Christmas morning Church in many many years.
Next I go through the list of reasons why it is good to do Christmas Day this way, but the list is not convincing me so much any more. Yes, the children love to see their cousins - but they see them other times of the year too. Yes, the kids are excited about presents from Grandpa, but a few days wait wouldn't be that hard. Yes, some older family members would be disappointed not to have the entire family gathered around on Christmas Day, but I'm growing less inclined to humour them on this one. And I am growing concerned that we are not creating a central family space of our own, that the children will be happy to return to when they are grown (though not necessarily at Christmas) - James isn't planning to be a part of any of our family Christmas stuff, which makes me just so sad.
Every year I say that we will just have to put our (collective) foot down, and confess we want to make Christmas Day a day for our own family stuff, and will not be travelling down to join the extended family. But so far it hasn't happened. Maybe next year.
-- end of rant --
posted by DebF at 9:03 am
3 Comments:
I hear you, Deb, and I feel your pain! My story is similiar but different ... each year the whole extended family (three other families) descends on my roomy, air-conditioned house with a pool (wonder why?) and basically trashes it. They bring their dogs (we don't have dogs!) and lie on my good furniture, spread food and mess through the house, and generally have a great time at my expense. So last year, as they drove out, and I was almost in tears, we made the decision to cancel Christmas at our house!!! The next day I booked a unit for a week somewhere away from home, and we will not be here for xmas. I am really REALLY looking forward to a quiet christmas with MY family, who I quite like, lol! So ... be brave, and put your foot down! I'll let you know how christmas day goes, lol!!! :)
I know how you feel. I wish I could start a new tradition with just my little one and my other half, but both our parents would be livid with us!
I hope you work out some better arrangements for next christmas.
Oh girly! HUGS.
Make them do it year about, let them come to your place for christmas! This year we wanted to spend the day at home, do our own thing etc, but my mum had to have dinner at her place so we said yup ok but next year you can come to our house or do your own thing, we like having xmas in our own home so the kids can enjoy their xmas pressies that day without having to trapse all over to see everyone.
Christmas is a time of family yes... but which family?
To me I would much prefer to have most of the day spent with my kids and partner, doing our own thing, without the bother of rush rush hurry hurry.
Ok now i ranted.. oops
HUGS and best wishes for Xmas my dear dear friend.
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